Off-late one of my friend’s wife happened to call me. I have been to there wedding which was a love marriage after 9 long years of wonderful relationship, I was surprised to know that within months of there marriage, things started to change.
As I was wondering- What would have gone wrong! I managed to ask her, what actually happened!
And the story began, almost same like many other in the relationships I have been counseling over the last 7-8 years.
“He has changed after marriage” was the first line, followed by, “He made so many promises which he never kept”… “He lied to me, my family… we don’t trust him anymore”…”I am thinking of leaving him(divorce)” and on & On & on it goes!
I am…. like… kindly tell me what happened… the story began about what she expects him to do & be & have … and how he is NOT at all ready to listen to her & how he is trying to explain every-time to her that He is doing it all for their better future & he don’t want to be trapped in the life the way others are… but has not made any progress in Life for a long time!
Fortunately, I had a call from my friend few days back asking me a help in his business & I knew that the guy is dead-serious about his business, he loved his wife dearly & wanted to really have her to live like a Queen!
But, as we know, about business & those who go after their dreams, the path is NOT so easy as it might seem… He was doing everything possible & was 100% confident about his success but his wife and in-laws who came from “Employee” & “Traditional Business” background could not just understand what he is doing… and he being the one who aspires to succeed, could not think of killing his Dreams..
The problem here as you might have guessed, was “NOT” Lack of Love, Deceit or cheating or fake Promises… the problem was rather simple, Different Views, Perspective & Understanding of Lives!
And as we can observe, most of the issues in the relationships are caused because of different life-blueprint that we hold in our subconscious!
LOVE NEVER CEASE TO EXIST !
NOBODY CAN CHEAT THE PERSON WHOM THEY LOVE SO DEARLY !
PARENTS, FRIENDS & SOCIETY ARE NOT ALWAYS RIGHT !
And, NO MATTER WHAT THE WORLD SAY, WE OUGHT TO STICK TO THE ONE WE LOVE, NO MATTER WHAT !
If only, the couple could have a commitment to stick together to each other through Thick & Thin, ready to sit & talk to each other with calm mind & resolve to make things work together, the World would be altogether a different place!
And that’s what I suggested her, “You Loved him & married him. Don’t you think its NOW your responsibility to stick to him, no matter what he goes through & support him when you have made commitment to be with him for 7 births!”
She answered, “Yes, I believe what you say is right. But, my parents and everyone else are suggesting me to divorce him while I am still young & they will marry me to someone else!”
I – “Did your parents & neighbors married him”
She – “No. I did.”
I – Then who should fulfill her responsibility.”
She – “I should. But since he is not making much, we don’t even have money to run daily life & we are fighting daily on money matter.
I- “At this point when the guy who loves you so much, is struggling to make ends meet. Don’t you feel that the least he should expect is your love & support.” When she gave an affirmative response, I continued, ” You are yourself capable of getting a small job and supporting your family, (I cited example of Narayan Murthy(Founder, Infosys) who I read, had lived on his wife’s income for 10 years approx.)”. She agreed & I continued, “And, the first thing you should do is to call him & tell him that you love him dearly & is ready to stand by him in whatever decision he will take & he can go on with whatever he is doing. “
You don’t develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.
– Epicurus
I didn’t hear from either of them for long. But when I did hear off-late, I came to know, his husband was absolutely surprised and felt blessed when she told him so, and he gave more of himself into his business (this time more with heart & soul). his business started doing well in few months & she also took the job to support their household expenses, which also helped her husband(& my friend) to focus solely on his business & with emotional turmoil NO MORE, they are living happily since then!
I hope this story makes us to think about our present, past & future relationship in more depth. I believe the most important thing on this planet is Relationship, be it personal life or professional, business or home, if the relationship & understanding between people is GOOD, everything can go well.
We don’t need to Blame, Criticize or Complain. Rather, we need to learn to Understand things & people from different perspectives and Believe that everybody is doing Best in their capacity, and trust me, they are!
Thank you for reading this post. I shall be glad to know if & how it helped you in comments sections & shall be pleased if you share this post to your friends & family so that we can fulfill our vision of Reloading Life on Earth – One World, One Family, Abundance for All. We love to help, don’t we!
~ Relationship ~
